Whew.

It never fails to amaze me that the knowledge I take for granted from living here many other folks never know. We had guests this weekend at the farm - longtime friends. They live in town and love to come and stay overnight on the farm and walk around and look at things and learn. Some of the most basic information yields a 30 minute conversation. Sometimes it is hard to convince them of the truth. Try explaining to a townie that you don’t need a rooster to have eggs. I have no idea why that misconception is so common, but it sure is. As a last resort I often have to point at the ladies and say, “You lay eggs without a rooster around.” Ah, that usually does it. You don’t even want to know about the discussion regarding the burning stump in the yard (which is still burning 15 days later).

The last week or so I have been especially startled by the misconceptions that I run into when talking with kids. I decided that while there would likely be many more, I would list the ones from this week. There were times I just had to slap my forehead and wonder what the world is coming to.

Hot Milk:  I was talking with kids about the differences between the Amish and the way that we live. It wasn’t long before someone asked whether I had ever milked a cow. Well sure! That wasn’t something that I was around within the family, but I’ve had an occasion or two. The kids were not able to see how something that came from a cow got into the cooler at the grocery store. At some point I reminded them that the only difference between the milk from a cow and the milk in the store is that it’s cold when you buy it (I know, there‘s more to it). It was at that point someone yells, “So, we’re drinking pee?!” Huh? I’m not sure where the leap from warm milk to urine came, but there it was. I quickly realized that these kids hadn’t even seen a cow milked or pee to know that it is two different places. These kids need to stand at the pasture gate and watch some things happen. They’d be better for it.

Modern Amish:  At some point later in the same discussion we were talking about the Amish desire for a simpler life. In this desire they have chosen to live without electricity (or at least pay the REA for it, but that’s another topic). I was pretty sure they didn’t have a connection with that, so I mentioned that there wouldn’t be any TV, video games, light switches, or phones. Within milliseconds someone said, “So, how do they get on the internet?” At this point I was sure that none of them had ever gotten outside the city. In the modern city where the power lines run underground most of these children have never even had the power go out. What would they do if it went out long enough that all of the batteries on their toys went dead? They should all live out where they are the last house on the line and all of the wires swing in the breeze. They would learn to be ready to sit and be cold really quickly! Ugh.

Rocks and Dirt:  My kids ask about the pets at the farm each day. That is something they can understand - the joy of an animal. It was no surprise when one of them brought the chickens a Valentine’s Day present - two little bags of cracked corn with ribbons on them. I told her that I would take pictures of the chickens eating the treats so that she could see them. The next day she asked if the chickens had eaten their corn. It had snowed overnight and I told her that the chickens didn’t like to go out in the snow and they needed to be able to get to dirt to help them eat. She just looked at me with a blank stare. I told her that chickens don’t have a stomach and so they needed to be able to eat gravel and rocks and grit to help them with their food. “So, they eat poop?” Huh (again)? No, they eat grit to help them with their food. “Yeah, but that’s poop and stuff.” Of course, I didn’t mention that they often do because that would only reinforce the thought. I really can’t do anything to help some of these kids. Seriously.

Clothing Breakdown: When talking about the southeast we ran across a picture of a cotton farmer standing in his field. We talked about how around my house the farmers grow things like soybeans and wheat, but the weather in the south is perfect for growing cotton. I once again had the feeling that the connection wasn’t there. I told them that the cotton in the picture was used to make thread which was woven into cloth. As I pointed out the different clothing that everyone was wearing the cotton the freak-outs started. “You mean we’re wearing plants?” At that point several of them vowed to never wear cotton again. I just don’t get it. How can you get to be 10 years old and not realize that your clothing is made from actual cotton? What have these parents been talking about with them? Obviously not daily living things.  Do they think it just appears?

It’s easy to see that there’s really no place to start. You can’t make anyone worldly overnight. Most of these kids have never seen a dirt road or a mailbox on a post. They don’t know what happens when it gets dark if there is no street light. They have no concept of living without the desire to turn on the TV all day long. It’s not hard to see that the more generations removed everyone is from country living the less able people are to connect with every aspect of their lives. There are lots of folks out there who have only eaten foods with a mystery background. Clearly I am a little bit biased here, but there seems to be something wrong with that. Although it takes a monetary commitment, it is important to me to know where the eggs, chicken, beef, fruit, and vegetables that I eat come from. These kids need to stare at an animal for six months and then know that they are eating it.  If they spent a summer day bent over weeding the garden they would likely value that watermelon just a little bit more.

We probably should just turn back the clock, drop everyone out on their own, and see who really makes it in the real world. OR, I’ll just come home each day to my peace and quiet and they can play their video games.